November 8, 2003 -- wellz.. got me a car.. got me a car.. lolz its purple tho.. its koo i cant be picky tho cuz i gots me no money... yea but im still feelinz down.. da kairos jus got me down.. b4 it i was all happy boutz life n everytinz.. but den i come back realizin im shit.. i got shit.. i treat ppl like shit.. like i realize how much mah mom does.. and i cry cuz its jus unfair. she has to work so hard to do the same tingz dat otha moms do.. cuz she gots such a crappy job.. shes gotta work ovatime.. and it killz me wen she comes home sayin her back hurts and all.. damn it ... why'z life gotta be so unfair to her.. den derz mah stepdad who doesnt help.. o wellz.................. THANK YOU LETTER WRITERs... esp sinit and nick.. i was soo moved by da letters.. n den ta find out sinit actually kept watch on da car.. damn it sinit u jus too damn good of a friend... lolz not to sound homosexual or netinz.. but i luv u both.. lolz in a brotherly way.. and not no fraternity brotherly, nor priest - member kind of way.. (lolz i still take jabs at organizations i detest as u can see)... aitez dats it.. "the real aint nottinz great"

November 7, 2003 -- happy bday olda brotha... wellz i jus got bak from retreat.. jus like a brainwash i felt.. newayz da onli real problem was wit lettas.... i write bout da retreat wen im feelin betta ask if u care.. den i got home n da car was gone.. i freaked out but found out brotha had it.. he took it cuz he realized he left 600 in it.. eRr .. den called him and asked if he could pick me up.. well he couldnt den i called step dad.. da fam was in parmatown mall.. dat was farawy so took bus.. da ppl so nice.. i forgot how nice they could be.. den walked da 10 streets ta get home cuz i kept tellin dem where i was but dey were slo.. so i walked.. and so dey didnt realize i walked..wateva.. got lectured wen i got home.. no welcome. no hi. no love.. wateva... ill talk lata... da emptiness inside.. da emptiness of color.. da emptiness... "The Real Aint Nottinz Great"

October 28, 2003 -- i jus aint been feelin good lately.. im sick ... n den i heard sometinz to make me sick... ppl change so much... itz so stupid wat happened too... wateva... n den somtin jus happened datz makin me sad.. i was listenin to a song and readin sumtinz and guess wat it was like on da same line... iono itz jus creepy.. newayz.. i tinkz im chillin wit sinit, betty, yen, and prob som mo ppl on halloween.. lolz sinit makin me a car costume.. dey didnt tink i would b in fo it.. shoot.. itd be mos definantely different.. i guess ill jus see wat happenz.. swrz been on rollacoaster nowadayz.... "The Real Aint Nuttin Great"

October 23, 2003...wellz lookz like ima b busi dis weekend.. i guess.. err been buzy wit skoo all week.. mayb i shouldve takin dis weekend off.. err guess no break fo me.. newayz i heard couple dayz ago dat sum body was talkn bout me behind mah back.. sayin dat im like snobby by not talkin ta sum ppl.. damn it... #1 ummz i dont do dat. shiet i talk ta e'eryone.. #2. who da hell is u talkin behind mah back.. too scurred?? jus like trang puts it.. a bitch dat talk behind mah bak is a bitch too scurred to be fuxed wit... wateva.... and #3 where da hell dyou get off tinkinz i can talk ta e'eryone at da skoo.. u must not be dat much of a priority ta talk to if i dont talk to u.. i bet u is one of dem boiz dat tinks everytinz bout him and dat da world gotta be at ur feet. fux u... NEWAYZ.. lookz like im gettin a new car since i aint have mah car in a long minute heaz lolz.. so mah grandfatha helpin out and buyin me a car. dis weekend im suppose ta go look round.. im not gonna mention mah otha planz fo da weekend cuz dey pretty much unconfirmed... wateva happenz happenz....... "The Real Aint Nottin Great"

October 22, 2003 -- HAPPY BIRTHDAY JIM ROWELL... too bad u vomitin and sick... hope u getz betta... okz.. well itz cold.. huge ass final tmrw.. i should go study.. i gotta do lots of stuff.. o wellz.. nottinz but skoo latelyz.. wanna se scary movie 3.. hint hint... lolz.. ima go stundy

October 18, 2003 -- hmm... jus came bak from bowling.. it was like da hip bowling wit da music, lights and ish.. lolz u kno wat im talkin bout.. itz koo but like itz 15 a person.. and dat seem xpensive to me i guess.. itz like 11 to 1 unlimited bowling tho.. so if u up fo it itz good. dayamn dis week had itz highs and a lot of lows i guess.. i mean mah grades slowly goin up.. but like i was fuxin mad at times and i get bored at home lolz.. plus i like was a slacker.. but wateva.. shit i go on retreat on Nov 4.. datz bullshit to me cuz i dont wanna go.. itz not like im catholic... err and da kidz der jus pssin me off mo as da weekz go by.. i guess i should jus stay away from certain ppl who soo fuxkin two faced. aitez dats it fo now.. cuz im tired.

October 12, 2003 -- dayamn itz early in da mornin.. ITz 10:30 lolz..im onli writin cuz i had a weird ass dream.. or at least i tinkz its a dream.. ill explain dat lata. newayz i was like in chicago at like some mall or sumtinz.. stopped der b4 i had to go to a party.. i was goin round lookin at jewelry stores.. and like im out da mall and find i mah hand a necklace dat spells someone's name.. u kno wat dem are..so i wonder if dat has ne meanin.. den all of a sudden im in anotha buildin runnin away from mah mom who was tryin ta take me to dis one lady.. it was dat i feared dis lady was gonna have a daughter or sumtinz and dat we would be set up lolz.. but den it turns out dat da lady was a fortune teller and tol me mah fortune.. she said i was gonna end up wit dat person who i had da necklace fo.. and den she said dat like sometime afta i got married to dat girl.. dat i was gonna end up goin ta a funeral to one of mah frienz..which is really saddenin to think dat neone of us could die soo young. (im guessin dis round or late 20s lolz).. see iono how much control of dis dream i had if ne at all... cuz like it felt like i could change da name of da person dat was gonna die.. mayb i couldnt mayb i jus thought i could.. who knoz...

October 11, 2003 -- same ol same ol.. datz why mah sitez been up and down.. and i havent written in a minute. but im back fo nows.. new layout wont be done fo awhilez.. newayz.. i went up ta wilbur wright yestaday.. damn i miss dat skoo.. onli got to talk to two teachers.. mrs. kearney and mrs. ego-meyer (or sumtinz like dat).. lolz she WAS ms. klucas.. spent like an hour and half up der jus talkin ta dem two teachers lolz.. ritez me and sinit went up der at 1 but nooo muthafuxers like u gotta come back at 245.. so we jus went ta parmatown ta da arcade.. i aint been in der foeva.. den we went bak ta wilbur wright.. den ta play pool.. and dat was it.. not so thrillin ta readers aye lolz.. life's jus been up and down fo me.. iono nemo.. and ive not written foeva.. like poetry or music.. i use ta at least write one a week.. iono maybe itz cuz im too busy or mayb im jus not havin inspiration.. which scarez da hell out of me.. im not one dat writes wen i say i do.. i write wen i feel like it.. like wen da feelin ta write comes.. o wellz. i guess it corresponds wit mah feelins lately.. jus bein icky.. up and downs.. dont kno how i feel bout some tings at timez.. (in actuality i kno one reason why ive been feelin like dis.. but i aint gonna say.. i kno itz childish.. but it feelz like ders so much on da line if i do say sumtinz.. itz complicatin.. jus let it be and see how it playz..) aitez dats enuff fo today

September 25, 2003 -- well ive juz been bizzy krzy.. no time nemo.. hw has taken everythang frum me lolz den i got classes 3-6 on tuesdays at tri-c.. and lookz like ima start takin nail classes.. and b workin on weekends at dat and wen i get mah license work on weekends shiet wherez mah teen years goin lolz.. i jus need a vacation already.. damn it.. lolz .. i swr im an overachiever.. like i feel like i needta do everythang..iono.. like how e'eryone seem ta got a job n all and i feel like i should have one.. lolz.. and dat wasnt even da reason im startin nail skoo.. im startin nail skoo cuz mah bro insisted on it.. owellz.. i jus feel like i gotta be like near da top in thangz.. its eventually gonna tire me out and kill me lolz.. watch....

September 24, 2003 -- i swr.. u kno i thought dat goin ta an all boiz skoo and like a prep skoo dat der wouldnt be so much two faced pplz.. but ders mo der.. it psses me off.. dese ppl who pretend ta be ur friend den gonna like be downin u cuz u dont do sumtin.. if dey is ur friend den dey should kno dat u wouldnt do it no matta wat cuz of da type of person u iz.. wateva.. sumtimez i jus wanna be like hey bitch u needta stop talkin frum both sides.. cuz dey jus run dey mouths like da aol icon.. lolz dat was fuxin corny.. but i was jus tinkin of how some website had ta take dat icon down cuz aol wuldnt let dem put it up.. it was publicity fo aim too but wateva.. back ta da subject.. it seemz dat da kidz at mah skoo even mo frontin cuz dey been taught ta be nice to e'eryone.. u kno dat dat aint alwayz tru in public skoo.. u jus do wateva lolz.. i miss it..

September 19, 2003 -- dayamn im like been tinknz too much or sumtinz.. it seemz like dat half da world is EXTREMELY priviledged and gots e'erythang, while tha otha half got jack shit. And im in da half dat got jack shit. i mean suriouzly tho.. n im talkn mo than materialism heaz..fux it i got no time ta tink nemoz.. at least hopefulli.. next week i start mah classes at tri-c.. on tuesdays frum 3-6.. programmn ish.. n rite nowz im jus bizzy wit so much ish ta do.. hopefulli i wont be tinknz too much.. i jus get down wen i be doin that tho.. who knoz

August 17, 2003 -- iono decided to write jus ta write.. itz like how come da worldz gotta be so ruff.. ionoz.. how come u neva get wat u really want.. and i have a feelin ill neva get wat i really want.. hmm.. hard ta get inta it witout givin it away.. o wellz.. despite dis version bein "personal" i think some thingz betta left unsaid.

August 16, 2003 -- well i finished mah hw and turned it in at 9 dis mornin.. i was up till 3:30 last nite finishin it.. happy im done. today went ta da mall wit trang and nan.. den we went ta see rany and da baby... da babi is so small.. congrats btw.. its hard ta imagine we wuz eva that small..mang mah stepdad trippn again.. i swr.. he leavez da house and den dont tell noone hes gone and expects me ta babysit witout askin.. den wen i was bousta bounce i call him askin where he wuz.. it took dat bitch mo den 2 hours ta get shit.. well i call him and ask.. he started gettin mad at me and shiet.. wateva.. so i had ta wait till he got home to get out.. den hes gonna be lecturin me.. hate dat shiet.. itz mo complicated jus dont wanna get into it.. im tired as fuck..well i went ta movies wanted to see freddy vs jason.. wouldnt let me in.. instead saw s.w.a.t. kinda blah.Mah webcam is bein funni

August 13, 2003... well im back.. should be doin hw.. but had to write in here..got in yesterday.. krzy tho.. almost missed mah connection in detroit.. stupid delays.. den wen i got home did nottin but catch up lolz.. saw mars yesterday..made me wish i had som1 here wit me to look at the stars wit... thanx trang fo tellin me bout it.. its damn bright fo a planet.. da red made it look koo.. different.. well i start skoo monday.. annoyin.. still wanna go ta cedar point..hmm jus been sortin stuff out latelyz... talkin ta nan rite now.. u kno shez really good at this advice shietz... lolz.. thanx.. well not much ta say cuz i should start hw.. write lata.

July 4, 2003.. independence day..Well its like 10pm.. i aint out on da lake or wateva ta see da fireworks cuz im tired and like i aint wanna go cuz its lots of da lil kids in da family and i aint ready ta deal wit it lolz.. im jus tired.. went ta sleep round 3 den woke up at 8.. dats extremely unusual for me.. cuz i need like 8 hrz of sleep.. yea it do sound a lot.. im jus not use to not having sleep.. had family bbq and stuff today @ mah grandfatherz.. it was aite. not much ta say.. i gotta go to dis family thing ta celebrate eitha one of mah grandparents bday tmrw.. den on sunday da otha grandparent's.. its all dressy and shiet.. i hate bein dressy.. mah feel is that if we the ones payin how come we cant feel comfortable like in casual clothes.. wateva.. boojee shiet.. lolz i dont even kno how ta spell dat word.. but like pretendin ta be rich when u eitha came from poor or u poor.. ? u kno da word?? well datz bout it.