[April 23]hmm. wats been happening.. well nm lolz haha. last nite i went to tha ignatius uber thang.. seen some faces there i aint seen in a minute.. but o wellz lolz.. it was ok and fun but like i had higher expectations.. haha i know high expectations for an iggy event? well its cuz i knew the kid who was hleping wit da planning and he was tellin me about it.. anywayz met new ppl and danced .. it ended early due to too many people supposedly.. but i also heard people was gettin hurt.. who knoz.. aftawards me, andrew, n katie headed over to matt's house jus to chill. i got home at 2ish.. it was fun. aint it funny how time flies by?? its damn near may and aps comin crawlin up on me buggin me.. oh and prom.. manique mite not be able to go cuz of districts.. its like shit lolz... oh wellz maybe i should get things done.. till lata.. have fun.
[April 13] -- oh geez.. two more weeks and two more days till my first ap test.. woo hoo.. i should become delirious real soon, don't mind me if i go crazy!!! lolz but after those two weeks of ap testing, you will notice that i will be sort of normal again? maybe?No sleep and no play makes tan go CRAZAY?!! oh and happy khmer new year... yeah im not khmer but its to my khmer peoples! lolz..
[April 5] -- i'm so tired, school needs to be done. Lifes a rollercoaster once again, I get my ups and downs, but i'm hoping that I will get to a point where i'm going up again and that this peak is infinite, it would be nice. I've been losing sooo much sleep and ive been really stressed out about my home situation. There is so much going to happen in the next two months that I don't even know what I'm gonna do. So tired so stressed, so annoyed, my so called life
[March 30] -- Mariah Carey - We Belong Together... so I am writing two days after the other one lolz.. Whoa thas weird. lolz anyways yesterday i went to school then just chilled at home. Today I chilled wit my nephew, niece, and bro playin basketball since it was a damn nice day. I then went to da mall to chill wit marcella n paul.. den i jus caught up wit chrissy, i kinda forgot to call lolz.. but i'll call her tmrw. oh aitez i have no idea why i wrote.. did i tellyall i got new fish.. im so happy. lolz ive been without fish for like a month. okz lolz anywayz.. i really have nottin to write.. ttyl
[March 28] -- So i only wanted to post because i wanted to show you this $15 bottled water from my mom's work she got to bring home cuz the guests left them.
Can you believe it? $15 DOLLARS its like regular water too lolz. Its called VOSS and its "artesian water from norway"[March 27] -- Toni Braxton - Please (YUP NEW TONI)-- I didn't realize how long i haven't written in here till Marcella said sometin, so I decided I should write today. Im at my brothers shop waitin for his girlfriend to get ready to eat some Sushi, woowee.. Anyways its spring break and im happy it is. Im so sick of school, sadly though i'll be there monday to do more science stuff, i know how sad, im a dork what else =). So i sent my acceptance stuff to Toledo. Glad that shits done wit.. somehow i gotta get money for books and since my brother says i should get a single room, i gotta get the 800 for the difference. Hmm.. lets see
Thursday i went to Tomo Hibachi and Sushi in strongsville wit Nick and Srini. Right afta we went to Coldstone to get some ice cream. It felt like summer, just clownin round and all.
Friday I went ta tha mall with my MOM, yes my mom, and my little brother. After gettin some chicken terriyaki, we just went round lookin for stuff and my mom got her china.
Saturday, which is today i sorta "worked." Sinit came in cuz Manique went to tan, lolz. It was sorta crazy today cuz tmrw is Easter. Speakin of which I am going to Church and then Easter Lunch tmrw. Yea I'm actually going to church. Well that is basically it. Well thas basically it, Happy Easter, or rather celebrate that Jesus rose?
I STILL don't know what to do for Prom lolz =)
[March 12] -- Olivia - All -- Happy Birthday Sinit.. damn 18.. legal boi lolz..i really have no idea the title of the song because its off the web. Its with the damn beat of youngbloodz but olivia singin it.. its good. ill get it playin in the bg sometime.. anywayz its almost half month since ive posted. i didn't realize it till betty was buggin me about it. Well heres wat went down...
1. I did get scholarship and its 99% that I'm going to the University of Toledo (go rockets)
2. dork that i am, i went to a math competition on sat feb 26. aint do too well and hated waking up early to go pick up jimmy in clev hts den heading over to olmsted falls. wateva lolz..
3. i got a surprise like wednesday the week of feb. 28 finding out that i was nominated for the Plain Dealer standout senior. woo hoo? hopefully i can win for the recognition and the 250.. i need my ching ching lolz.. no itd just be really cool to be part of that group.. but im not gonna jinx anything.
4. Week of February 28 was pretty much gettin stuff together for Scioly of which last weekend we competed and got 2nd all around. i got me first in forensics and mission possible while gettin 2nd for towers and 7th for health science.
5. Friday last weekend i chilled wit marcella, alex, tino, michelle, n mike over at marcella's. We jus chilled, had a tekken 5 tourney, played pretty princess, etc.. i ended up winning the tourney somehow. =)
6. this weekend i pretty much just did nothing on friday and worked on saturday. tmrw i gotta catch up on hw and possible chill at the mall cuz i gotta pay some bills there.
7. im sorta looking for a prom date now. May 29 is the date. lolz.. iono i think i'll just ask my good old buddy chrissy. hopefully shes available to go. i mean i think itd be more fun to go with a friend than to go with someone you barely know. hmm... how early should i ask?? lolz.. oh wellz.. who knows.. things may change soon.
i was on myspace.. yes ive succumbed to the doomsday device, and i came across thu, chau's and tram's myspace.. its soo weird that i did.. but damn she stayed really pretty.. errgh lolz.. ok i think this is a long enough entry to last another half month or so =)
[February 21] -- Going Crazy - Natalie. Geez about a month since ive written. that is crazy. well in short things are just there for me lately. last weekend was pretty much run errands on friday, work saturday, dave and busters that nite, sunday work and chill wit nephews and niece, monday scioly and catching up on hw. its just there like i said. i have to wake up earlier nowadays cuz now i have to take thomas to school and so i get to school just 10 minutes before it starts.. i don't mind.. i do mind the sleep though. oh well. im waiting for a scholarship response this week, i so dearly hope i get it. it would mean soooo much to me. then there is my laptop that should be here within the week. the damn screen broke. thankful that it was within the warranty though. that is pretty much what life is for me. kinda lonely i know, but hey what can i do, i have responsibilities. i feel as if i was forced to grow up way to damn fast and of course i do blame it on this one person, but blaming him wont get my ass nowhere. oh wellz
[January 27] -- Why Do I Feel So Sad - Alicia Keys.. you ever have that feeling that sometimes music just finds you? I mean i just got Songs in A Minor from half price books for a DOLLAR and like i was listenin to this and found this song. This song seriously explains how im feeling and ive been playin it ever since ive gotten it. crazy aint it. i dont know.. i just feel as if everything around me is crumbling faster than i thought it would. its like i knew it would crumble, but i didn't realize how fast. Now i feel like i did back in freshman year. feel like im starting all over. Like i have to build up again, only difference is this time I am not gonna be permanent so it feels futile to do any building and now im at a stand still. I don't know what to do.
[January 8] -- Let Me Love You -- Mario -- this is my jam.. damn its good.. i don't know.. i am officially 18 and an "adult" but oh how i do fear that word in so many ways.. yeah it do feel like a midlife crisis for me. its just that i don't feel like i'e done jack shit up until this point of my life and im afraid that i won't do much for the rest of it.... oh well.. maybe thats just my destiny my life..
[January 2] -- Are You Happy Now - Michelle Branch ... it's a new year. Another day. Another minute of my life. And here i stand not sure of the future but happy just to be happy. I almost want school to start up again. It will like add some regularity to my life. But at the expense of my grades may be the cost. Je suis tres fatiguee. Pour les trois jours derniers est tres miserables pour moi. J'ai dormi a 3 ou 4 heures dans le matin parce que mes devoirs. And then there is that whole car situation that is haunting me. I had a good thing at target. I made friends. It got me out of the house. It exposed me to all types of people. THen it was stripped away from me with the provision that I would get a new car. My brother decided he would change his mind. My decision is irreversible. How sad. How annoying. See it doesn't seem so petty to everyone now does it? errgh whatever. Time to sleep.
[December 21] -- My Happy Ending - Avril Lavigne ... i can never really be happy can I? I mean is it a rule in the universe that I just can never be happy? Lets see I am going to start with the happy stuff so you don't have to read the bad stuff if you don't want to. Lets begin with me jus chillin on fridays wit tino, marcella, and mike at parmatown. Then i get to talk to chrissy cuz she works there. I then went christmas shopping at westgate. And lemme tell you i saw all of like 25 people. It was weird. But i got a lot of chrismtas shopping done. Oh wellz. OKAY moving on. Ummz well lets see. My oldest brother is having some problems. Goodness. It makes me mad. He has been working to work because of problems. I aint going into it, it aint mine to tell. I just hate the situation though. Ok then there is the whole situation with my car. My mom and I went looking today. Well we got a good price, but my brother refuses to let in and allow us to get it. He wants me to get an older car. Whatever. Then schoolwork is piling up but I have not really gotten any of it done. Then at work I am like nervous, but tomorrow I am resolute. My purple car is dying and christmas doesn't feel like christmas any more. Not to mention I truly hate the fact that I am turning 18 soon. BLAH
[December 7] -- All I Have - J.Lo .... Pearl Harbor remembrance day AND my mommas bday...... well its DECEMBER already.. crazy shit aint it.. my deck got stole again.. this time it seemed to be a planned thing.. they also got kevin augustin's shit.. thas crazy man.. u cant even trust people nowadays.. i pray for them... oh well.. its rather disturbing... life has slowed down for me.. i am so glad.. woohoo.. both osu and uot got my apps.. thank goodness.. ummz i chilled wit tab melissa and tabs cuz jimbo.. we went to see closer.. it was weird. i wouldnt recommend it though lolz.
[November 28] -- currently listenin to : after the rain: mya.....hmm life.. wat a confusing thing you are... well i jus got me a laptop and other various things... soon ima be looking for another toy lolz... its gonna be fun.. hmm black white or maybe even blue or red? hmm who knows.. maybe whatever is there aye.. oh wellz.. thanksgivin was a drag.. did family stuff the whole time.. i did get to chill wit sinit a lil yesterday as we went to go lookin for sometin for his sis.. then last nite after work i went to eat wit betty at denny's ... that place is poppin at nite lolz.. all dese 17-24 year olds eatin der.. and some of them were hot.. includin me of course lolz.. well and todai im jus workin and doin homework.. so as u can see my break was a waste in some ways and in others not.. im sorta sore todai cuz friday nite i was movin these office furniture wit fam for my ba noi.. rosahs birthday is tmrw.. happy birthday rosah.. and then tabs birthday is on december 2.. happy birthday tab.. hmm.. i think that raps up this entry. till next time. have fun.
[November 22] -- so wats been up lateli? not much at all.. jus doin hw, work and helpin ou tmy family.. i got me some timbs saturday tho.. lolz thas tha highlight of mah week.. =).. i have like three applications to do still.. i kinda fell behind in math hw but ive been catchin up.. and hmm.. aint seen friends in a while.. but i think thatll change.. hmmz.. iono thas all i got to say.. i aint got much to say. ive been thinkin of changin domains to like tmstripes.com or sometin.. iono titetan.com is like it works iono but i like change... oh wellz.. a bientot
[November 7 nite] -- so my brothas birthday was today.. and so afta work we went to eat.. rite well lolz we gone and asked for free coasters.. no idea why.. ritez and den wen we wuz bout ta leave we took some mo coasters from the next table.. lolz now thats ghetto.
[November 7] -- its funni how life is... but i guess i gotta jus roll wit it.. some reflections on the week... i aint turn in my apps yet.. altho they are done woohoo.. i shoould do at least one more skoo.. school is school.. got my report card.. gpa is 4.42.. or wateva.. election on tuesday was blah.. i mean i didnt care for either i jus hated bush more.. oh wellz.. heres to hopin things are ok the next four years.. got my last paycheck from target on friday.. also, friday was wen i got sick.. i blame tino lolz.. saturday which is today, consider i am writin it 214 am in the mornin on sunday lolz.. i went to circuit city.. turns out im #101 so i dont get my 20 dollas.. its koo.. i aint bitta lolz.. den i went to home depot.. broke the thing i JUS bought there lolz.. shattered it.. but i did get me a plant.. den i went to mow grass.. n den to tha shop.. still in process of learnin.. ill get it.. and aftawards i went to movies wit betty.. we saw the grudge.. i was laughin lolz.. she was all scared... i thought it was a ridiculous movie, only redeeming qualities included sarah michelle gellar and the whole relationship between her and her boifriend.. well thas it for this week
[October 31] -- u ever get those times where NOTHING in the world seems to motivate you. Like thas how i am rite now.. its like why am i even awake, why not sleep till something good happens.. ive jus been feelin down for awhile. well yesterday was my last day at target.. so it was bittersweet. i had a nice time there, but at the same time im glad its over with.. time to move on... after work i went to eat wit betty.. lolz ol times ol times.. i miss them.. we jus caught up n everytin.. who knows whats ahead for me..
[October 28] -- talk about long time due.. i aint write in here in a minute.. i've given up on xanga.. ive decided its best to be over here. i am so perturbed about everything around me. I need a week to myself i think. I can't even have like a day to myself much less a week. My life is in such shambles. It needs recovery. So lonely. So sad.. So ME.
[August 28[ hmmz.. its so weird.. i dont kno.. i realli wish i knew.. and whoa shes pretty.. but i wish i knew.. but i dont.. damn it.. thas life i suppose.. to go to homecoming or not? that is the question... hmm... and who to ask.. or should i even ask.. hmmm... so weird.. hmm...
[August 15]BULLSHIT.. thas all i gotta say.. i hate the situation.. wateva.. newayz im so screwed for skoo if i dont start doin it lolz..
[August 4] im jus soo damn tired of this world.. everythin is makin me sick.. i swear i dont kno how some people live life.. its soo damn annoyin.. i like life but at the same time i truly hate it... oh well.. ill rumerate bout that at a later date....im jus realli sad at this moment.. maybe its the stress getting at me.. maybe its the circumstances... maybe its me.... anywayz.. i was thinkin earlier.. its funni how a couple of months (summer) can change so much.. can change a person so much.. can change life so much.. this summer has been so weird and different to me... so much stuff to recall and wrap up.. so many loose ends still left frailed... but im not gonna say anything yet....
[July 30] im so damned busy wit so much damn things to do.. i dont kno wat to do lolz... ima have one of those breakdowns lolz that celebrities be havin.. its funni... ohw ellz.. i guess ill deal.. who knoz.. i got orientation on the 20 but ima go in on the 18th.. weird..
[July 15] whys that my happiness is always so short.. im feelin realli shitty lately... i dont kno i mean in reality i kno exactly wat it is.. but its like wat can i do about it.. and its not like neones realli here for me either.. i mean shure they're HERE.. but not here... i tink u get wat i mean.. oh wellz.. scratch that.. u can forget netin i said.
[July 10]wellz.. i got back from ann arbor todai.. university of michigan is boring.. its like osu onli worse.. cuz at least osu got the oval lolz... and omg i hate detroit with a passion well not that much but u get my point.. its soo dirty and blah and i would not ever wanna live there.. \i went there cuz my mom wanted to go to the casino.. well i tink im goin to rochester to visit u. of roch. tmrw.. newayz at work... it as fine.. but like i realized that i realli dont like one of my supervisors.. cuz my other one she will be like ok u can do this.. but the other one she like well wen u have time do this.. like i didnt kno it already.. and she say it wit like an attitude u knoz... n wat makes me mad is that she treats me diff than otha ppl... like iono how she treat everyone but to some ppl she soo damn nice.. u knoz.. well wateva...aite ill write lata..
[July 4] ok so its independence day n yall kno it means more than fireworks.. it means that we remember wat we received this day in history.. we received our rights and responsibilities.. also privileges.. i tink dat we are so stuck on our rights and privileges that we forgot our responsibilities. lolz i tink thas enuff lecturin for todai.. but yall get da gist of it... okz... so work.. hmmz im crushin on these coworkers of mine lolz.. wat to do wat to do... mayb i should jus let it flo and see wat happens rite ? who knoz lolz..but like they say.. i shouldnt be wantin or expectin it cuz it wont happen.. oh wellz.. i was gonna say sometin else.. but minds somewhere else.. ill add it lata..
[July 2] i saw white chicks yesterday wit srini, nick, lori, n mary.. it wasnt taht good... it had its moments.. o wellz.. den i actualli stepped inside an A&F store.. im sooooo ashamed.. srinis like oh jus come in here for a second.. it was the outlet store and he wanted to get stuff.. den i had to go to work so i dropped nick off and rushed ta work.. got punched in 5 minutes late tho.. hopefulli it wont look bad.. who knoz.. all of my supervisors are real koo tho.. my coworkers are like gettin less defensive lolz.. so im likin it there.. i realli wish i was olda too lolz.. cuz im realli crushin on some of mah coworkers.. oh wellz.. newayz.. todai i got mah pics todai and then took a nap and went to try ta play ddr at sinits lolz.. n went home to chill wit mah nephews, niece, and thomas.. and here i am now.. aint i a loser lolz =).. well thas it.. im realli likin life i like to reiterate this cuz i usually dont
[June 30] im happi i said things ive said.. im bein realli confessional lately so if u talk to me u mite hear things new and things u mite not wanna hear.. sorriz =).. jus feel like i need everythin out there.. im happi rite now .. first in a year and so i need it to continue by sayin everythin i need to.
[June 29] wellz havent written fo whilez.. but i aint do much lateliz.. jus work and homework.. nottin special. u kno some of these people at work are like stuck up cant even say hi.. im talkin bout the coworkers.. i mean im new and u cant even say hi.. i kno u prob tired and all but damn.. no luv round der lolz.. i swear tho two of my supervisors look SOOO much like celebrities... one look like that girl elizabeth from the view, she was also on survivor and some show like look for less or sometinz.. den mah otha supervisor look like that girl from married to the kelleys.. lolz... i havent met too many coworkers.. cuz im tellin ya dey dont even wanna say hi.. so wateva lolz.. newayz.. da guests.. not customers guests.. lolz they okz.. at least they say hi.. but omg some of them are sooo damn picky.. and slow lolz.. cuz i get timed for how fast i check people out.. so i gotta get thingsdone quick.. my average score round like an 84% which is supposedly good for beginner.. but yall kno me.. i cant be havin that lolz.. aitez well thaz it
[June 24] im the happiest ive been in like months.. or maybe since last summer.. yea last summer... newayz.... im like slowli gettin my life together... ive got a job.. im still doin volunteer work and keepin up with summer homework... me n some people have gotten closer whilez otherz ive been distant with.. but ive been thinkin bout that since i was jus readin trangs post on her xanga and how like it made me think... i think the reason ppl grow distant is because of circumstances one doesnt wanna tell the other or both are hiding... i think i can give examples from each relationship (mind u im talkin bout like friendships and such not jus relationships"). i mean i tink that if the truth were out der tings wouldnt be so distant.. and im talkin bout the times that no drama occurs.. so that excludes like backstabbin and stuff... i realli dont think if ur interests are that different u wouldnt still talk.. cuz like im very different from like one of my closest friend at skoo.. but we still koo cuz we talk bout the things we do have in common.. and i think thas the thing.. everyone has sometin in common wit somebody but if u dont share it because of circumstances.. then thas wen things fall apart.. u must be willing to share.. i must admit i dont because of circumstances at times.. so there u go.. newayz.. lolz other stuff include gettin a subwoofer and amp for my car.. plus 15 rims (not pretty ones.. but they 15 and not 14s lolz) but i gotta get tires for it if i wanna use it... i also am takin a trip next month.. so there.. thas why im happi.. and i like dont got drama in mah life except wit mah stepdad and he aint here half the time so thas that... i can actualli say im realli happi about myself tooz.. like i kno this is kinda in the "not a normal guy thing" category (which i am adversely against the idea of havin wats manly and wats not).. but like i realli didnt like how i looked.. not sayin im lovin it rite now.. but like i can honestly say im happi bout it.. like im goin in da rite direction.. so theres that... and im done.. i doubt neone reads this whole thing.. u kno if u bored lolz...
[June 19]okz so target hasnt called.. been almost week on monday.. i tink ill call jus out of curiosity... todaiz... went to southpark wit sinit, manique and her friend.. den at 2 went downtown for aayat.. den to csu for asian heritage festival where we had to get 100 things filled out... den me, trang, rosah, nan, khang, lisah, nida, and vichitka went to rg jones to jus chill.. we played four corners, n tien len.. and dat lasted till 930.. and now im home jus doin nottinz tinkins of sleep cuz god knows if i think of sometin or someone else ill get depressed... lolz im retarded but oh wellz
[June 16]i realli hate myself i realli do.. i mean i tink im good but then i think about it soo damn much that i get it back... and then i get to readin and it sort of hurts but it helps me realize it wont eva happen so i should keep goinz.. who knoz.. i realli need target to call me.. i mean the work will put a lot of my mind to rest even tho it would be workikn.. its complicated lolz but if u kno me u should get that... oh wellz..
[June 14]I GOT A JOB A JOB!! ok thas all u need to kno for todai lolz
[June 13] so i got mah car new speakers since i couldnt drive the white car i decided i would buy sometin.. lolz im a spoiled brat that way.. but u kno wat.. i was mad and figured this would make me feel better.. and u kno wat.. it did!!!.. its ghetto installed rite now cuz i was runnin out of time. i had ta go ta matt's sista's parti... (earlier i jus went to the mall wit mah MOM yes ROSAH wit mah mom.. den ta target and at mcd i seen caress and sandra pierce).. so i went ta rosie's graduation parti.. they family is great like i said b4... lolz da pplz der was kinda annoyin in da way dat they are realli white suburban.. if yall seen clueless.. well a lot of them like that. OH MY GOD lolz.. der was kooz pplz too.. matt's girl and dis otha girl was like da onli two ppl dat i got to kno who were koo lolz.. well plus vinny nick and matt. okz ima stop.. lolz jus got home an ddecided to write thas why.. its like 112am.
[June 12] --
im so fucin tired of mah stepdad.. he fucin talks bout how he dont want me drivin MAH OWN fuxin car.. bitch please.. talkin bout how insurance would be expensive.. den i tell him wat if i paid for it.. and i knew he would be like it wouldnt be safe so i said it and hes like yea...
[June 8]--
i have to realize
that things neva go rite
and i dont kno why i still hope
wen its thread and no longer rope
im jus so tired of everything
ive lost sense of all feeling
i need to jus go wit da flo
cuz ive lost all that i know
so wat else am i to do
im tired of being blu
im jus tired of it all
i finally get up jus to fall
wat else is there
wen noones seems to care
i guess ill jus live on
everything since then has gone wrong
so so wrong and all bad
wen i think things are goin rite
it turns dark and there is no lite
seems like im at odds end
and theres notin left to ammend
its all changed to shit
theres nottin left that fits
im goin out of my mind
and running out of time
[June 7] -- [song]Mary J Blige - It's a wrap
[action] chattinz
[what im feelin]jus tired
todai was weird lolz.. i chilled wit mah brotha and his friend like most of the day.. they is GHETTO.. ok we wuz at a stoplite.. so mah brotha yells outd da window to a lady at a busstop talkin on her fone sayin sometinz and hes like u tell it girl.. lolz and shes like wat chinese restaurant u guys from.. lolz and my brotha definetly made up a name like wong tong somethin lolz.. newayz.. afta dat i stopped by sinits and shot a lil .. got da cd player to give to betty and den dat was it... here i am lolz..
[June 6] -- [song]Sarah Mclachlan - Stupid
[action] falling asleep
[what im feelin]jus tired
so i came back to reality todai afta havin mah fun yesterday.. iono jus not feelin happi..... hoping for things is stupid.. jus stupid.. dont hope or have faith in faith.. because it jus screws u in the end wen it doesnt happen... so thas how it goes.. maybe its jus me.. who knows... hope kills more than death..
[June 5] -- [song]Danni Minoque - I Begin to Wonder
[action] falling asleep
[what im feelin]jus tired
todai was realli koo.. woke up at 7 out door at 730 to take sat IIs.. so rite i get der and see tino and pete but den i see Kevin Baldwin.. im like oh shit.. so i went to catch up wit him, he still go to Hawkins and all... den i was waitin outside and see Melissa comin.. n wen she finally catches up we see tab who was wit Marie.. and i caught up wit dem Rhodes people.. but i had to leave dem lolz cuz i was takin sat ii and not sat.. da tests were ok.. den i went straight to edgewater for da AAYAT thing.. i aint play cuz i jus wasnt wantin ta.. but i got into water fights and all.. lolz i was smart i brought extra clothes.. der was like 40 pplz der.. stayed till 630 and den i jus went home. it was fun.. and on friday i caught up wit kenn, we stopped by melissa's work den went ta see Shrek 2.. that was funni.. and dats it.... oh and ive resolved to become a clam to some peoples that ive normally opened up to.. cuz i realize that as much as u want to trust ppl sometimes they may say things without realizin it.. so im gonna do me...
[June 2] -- [song]2pac - Changes
[action] studyin?
[what im feelin]sickenin
i got one more final and im done... so i should actualli be studyin... oh wellz ill do it... im still jobless.. please someone call me for an interview lolz.. why wont they!!! please tell me!!!!>... errz... lolz i need a good luck charm or sumtin... u kno mah stepdad still jobless too.. so i guess i shouldnt feel too bad.. watevaz... well i keep runnin.. and i dont know netin else but to run.. but i slow down everyweek and almost stop.. but i have to run.. cuz u see there's this other thing that appears everytime i slow or stop and it forces me to run.. so wat else am i to do?.. hahaha have fun decoding.
[May 30] -- [song]Monica - Right Here Waiting
[action] bout to read
[what im feelin]SHIT
Ii hate my stepfather with a burning passion that addicts have for crack.. more on that later... so friday i went to chill wit srini, dan, and nick at tower city.. we did da j. crew test.. since we all diff nationalities to test if they would say hi to us all lolz. so we went in one at a time separately.. but there was a black lady so our findings are inconclusive lolz.. newayz we went to see soulplane.. played on all da stereotypes.. kinda disappointed with the arab reference tho.. but otherwise it was a lite movie jus to lift u up... newayz der was also srini's frienz laurie and mary.. then on saturday i did jack shit but go to new chinatown buffet wit da fam to celebrate mah mom and leo's 12th anniversary... n todai i went to da rib cookoff wit mah brotha and his frienz.. dey is GHETTO.. okz lolz.. we wuz sittin at da channel 3 booth ritez, since noone was there and rite mah brothas girl had people comin up to her askin if she was givin things away or where the other people at channel 3 at.. so she played it off saying they had left earlier but they could take a flyer lolz... and den at da 105.7 booth mah brotha won a key to a car thingy.. so in september he gotta go out der to get a key to see if it is to the dodge pt cruiser convertible.. lolz that would be kinda nice if he won cuz den da otha car would be sold for money for stuff.. lolz.. its complicated.. yea dis entry gettin long... newayz.. i hate mah stepdad.. tellin me i got attitude towards him.. i wonda why the damn fux.. he treats mah car like a piece of shit.. treats it like its his.. mah prelude that is.. and he dont let me fuxin use it.. wateva bitch.. its mah car.. hes goin thru that midlife crisis shit and feels betta that he is drivin a sportscar.. screw him.. n den he gonna go off on me and shit.. but u kno damn rite he aint got no rite to cuz he leaves for more than half the year and comes back every so often pretendin he can be a father figure.. wateva bitch.. ok now dat im mad ima quit.. ima go read or do some summer hw.. i still need a damn job.. mah grandmotha says give it anotha week and den start callin dem to see wats up.. datz wat ima boutsta do.
[May 27] -- [song]Monica - Right Here Waiting
[action] shure
[what im feelin]SHIT
I swear, things jus aint been goin great.. especially since mah step dad came home.. wen i be ridin in mah prelude wit him.. i jus wanna go off on him.. he is hurting mah car.. he really is.. how u gonna start in 2nd gear?... how u gonna keep revvin it help wastin gas.. how u gonna be bout a foot away from the car in front of you.. screw it.. i cant say shit cuz i dont want shit to go down in dis family like it has in da past.. altho i dont think i can avoid it.. i jus heard mah brotha is wanted by the police for some damn reason.. he jus got back from visitin mah otha brotha in tennessee.. im really get sick of things.. and den mah otha brotha is like sorta bein a miser... and den mah stepdad dont kno how to spend money... wateva... its all goin down hill for me.. it jus sux.. not to mention that i have noone to tell these things cuz noone b carin... ive got a lot of damn problems. and i have yet to receive a call from any of the places i dropped apps at.. wateva... i jus needta run.. run... run far away.. but then again thas wat ive been doin wit mah problemz for the longest damn time.. its time i need to sort things out..
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May 2 2003 - May 22 2004